Caller Quotes

This is a list that I've been keeping since I started working for an IT Call Center. I started keeping it because I thought it was funny. At that time every time I heard a user say something funny, rediculous, or just plain dumb - I'd write it down on a post it note, stick it in my cube and look at them when I got frustrated. I ran out of room, so I combined them into a word document. It grows every day...

• “I hope I have the correct Address! I was told to email ‘jayoboyle’ but since that account didn’t exist, I deduced that she spelled out ‘J’.
  
  
• “I have enabled myself out of (program)
  
  
• “When we try to get our computer energized up…we can’t log in.”
  “Give me a few minutes…It’s trying to generate back up now”
  
  
• “I locked myself out of my password”
  
  
• “They gave me kind of this creepy password…It had letters and numbers”
  
  
• PW RESET: qn3s6heg :
  
  me:....h as in hotel, e as in-
  user: sorry, what was after the 6?
  me: H as in hotel, e as in echo, g as in golf
  user: what was after 6?
  me: H as in hotel
  user: ok..so that's 6, the number 8
  me: no..it's H as in hotel
  user: 8
  me: H as in Hotel
  user: 8 as in hotel?
  me: H as in hotel..as in..oh i don't know..halibut..heart
  user: Oh, you mean H as in heart
  me: yes, H as in hotel
  
  
  
• me: “do you know your employee ID number?”
  User: “no, but I know my mother's maiden name.”
  
  
  
• User: “I’m having trouble creating a password”
  me: “ok, are you a faculty?”
  User: “yes”
  Me: “ok..one second please”
  User: “yes, I’m a student”
  
  
  
• Me: do you have your voicemail set up?
  User: I’m sorry, my what?
  Me: your voicemail
  User: oh, I’m sorry…I thought you said placemat.
  
  
  
• Me: “I can’t tell when you change your password.”
  User: “can you tell that I changed my password this morning?”
  
  
  
• User: “It’s not a printer, It’s a copy machine we’re printing from”(when trying to get IP address of printer).
  
  
  
• “This is a request for a help ticket. Please sink Dr. blackberry to the data service. Her phone number is….”
  
  
  
• "i received a hallmark ecard... I was wondering if there were any viruses out there."
  
  
  
• "I think I’ve hit the uber lockout for the ."
  
  
  
• Me: Do you have your voicmail set up?
  User: um…I don’t know what that means.
  
  
  
• Me: what are you trying to log into?
  User: I don’t know.
  
  
  
• User: we cannot print bills
  Me: ok…What bills are you talking about? What program are you using?
  User: The bills..the ones that we print.
  
  
  
• “I need to get my password unset”
  
  
  
• Me: “did you have your caps lock on when you got locked out?”
  User: “no…let me try it again.”
  (user tries it and it doesn’t work)
  User: “well, my caps lock is off – let’s turn it on”
  (user tries it and it works)
  User: “Oh, well that’s weird..it let me in.”
  Me: “looks like you must have had your caps lock on when you made your new password”
  User: “No I didn’t…”
  
  
  
• User: “Are there any special rules about the new password?”
  Me: “Yes. It has to be at least 8 characters and alphanumeric.”
  User: “Ok, so does it need numbers in it and letters?
  Me: “Yes.”